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#WW The Greatest Conversation All Authors Have

4 Feb

Please donate if you can – I am hoping The Timely Death Trilogy can get new covers so that they can appeal to new audiences! You will also receive a personalized picture of Bogart the cat, and I will mention you right here on ShannonAThompson.com if you want your website shared. :] Just click the link and check your email! Thank you so much for your continuous support!

#WW: The Greatest Conversation All Authors Have

I don’t go out in public often. I like to believe this isn’t uncommon in the world of authorship. Even if authors have free time, it generally becomes devoted to typing away fantasies on our laptops. Because of this, I am home. A lot. Or in a café. By myself. (Free Wi-Fi, right?)

But every now and then, a friend is having a going away party or a birthday party or a graduation party or some other kind of get-together celebration I find myself attending. And yes, I’m the cliché chick in the corner, not talking to anyone, who oddly attracts someone’s curious attention as to why I’m standing in the corner. “People watching” is my go-to answer, but eventually, the question “what do you do?” comes up, and all hell breaks lose.

Yes. Yes. I’m an author. Now, let’s chat about it.

My party depiction

My party depiction

When you say, “That should be your next book.”

This sentence generally comes up when you’ve heard an interesting story – possibly on the news, from a friend, or…in a book. The fact that it already exists should hint that I can’t write it, but I’ll probably just say, “Yeah.”

When you continue with, “I should be in that book – your next book, right?”

No. Please, no. I’ll only offend you – either by detailed descriptions or impending doom. That’s honestly the only thing I could do with you (probably because I just met you, so I don’t know enough to truly base a character off of you, even if I wanted to). But I’ll probably just say, “If you don’t mind dying.” Sometimes – and these moments are rare due to my collection of odd character names – I already have a novel with your name in it.

That’s when you ask, “You already have a character in your book named after me?”

Well, no. Not technically. You two share the same name. Kind of like the barista that shares your mother’s name on her nametag. Doesn’t mean they’re the same person. Or based off of one another. It just means Laura was a popular name that summer.

When you ask, “Do I die?”

::sigh:: Again, the character is not you. They’re not based on you. They…Never mind. I’ll say, “Probably.”

When you reply, “You suck.” Followed by sarcastic laughter.

I say, “I know.” Followed by sarcastic laughter.

When you continue with, “Why do authors always have to kill off characters? And it’s always my favorite characters, too. I mean, they kill villains all the time, but I kind of like the villains…”

I might cut you off because I love, love, love talking about my undying love for villains, but if I fail – which I probably will – I’ll probably just nod in agreement. Authors know they’re terrible. We create imaginary friends for you to love and cherish, only to take them away. But it’s necessary. If nothing happened to any of the characters, then…well, you wouldn’t have a bunch of stories to talk about. Libraries would be collections of happy, non-dramatic anthologies of extraneous giddiness.

In the end, when you say, “This has been an awesome conversation.”

You know what? It has been. Thanks for chatting with me. Even if I held back, it was mainly out of my own…well, chaotic confusion I’ve built up in my own mind. You probably wouldn’t have been offended if I killed your character off, but I came up with that scenario because…well, authors spend a lot of time in their own heads imagining the next scene. This often bleeds over into real life, which causes those awkward pauses I’m extremely sorry for. I’m simply thinking too much. But if it’s any compensation, I was probably concocting my next novel from whatever you just said – so, in a way, you are in my next book.

Thanks for talking with me.

I mean it.

~SAT

Please donate if you can – I am hoping The Timely Death Trilogy can get new covers so that they can appeal to new audiences! You will also receive a personalized picture of Bogart the cat, and I will mention you right here on ShannonAThompson.com if you want your website shared. :] Just click the link and check your email! Thank you so much for your continuous support!

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